confirmation bias

Seek and You Shall Find; Confirmation Bias with Divorce

If you have ever been in love you know what a powerful drug love can be.  It may be the most powerful drug in the world.  No one can talk you out of being in love and it is usually a waste of time even attempting to do so.  The person in love is under a spell and will only…

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Infant

The Effects of Divorce and Separation on Infants

All children regardless of their age experience separation and divorce as painful processes that disrupt their lives. In fact, more than one half of the children who experience divorce, do so by age 6, and 75% of these children are younger than 3 years of age. If parents separate during the period of infancy, the infant will not understand what…

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King Solomon's Wisdom

King Solomon’s Advice on Co-Parenting

Most of us are familiar with the story of King Solomon and the two women both claiming the infant was her child.  He skilfully determined that the real mother would be willing to make a sacrifice. So King Solomon in his wisdom, ordered the guard to cut the infant in half.  Of course the mother immediately begged the King to…

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Story time

How Parents Can Help Their Toddler Navigate Divorce

Parents play an essential role in their toddler’s adjustment to divorce and family separation. Divorce is especially stressful and confusing for toddlers. Try to see the world through your toddler’s eyes. For toddlers, the support of a parent who knows them well and provides the stability and comfort they need, makes a world of difference. When toddlers spend time in…

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Part II. Different Paths to Seek a Divorce

Unfortunately no one wants to become an expert on divorce because we hope to never need the knowledge again.    However, it helps to know your options so you will not feel like a lamb being led to slaughter.  Knowledge is power.  Although I am not an attorney, I have been working with conflicted divorcing couples for over 30 years.  I…

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divorce cake

Divorce Terminology-Part I.

In this first of two blogs you will learn important legal terms that may help you navigate the divorce process with a better sense of the language.  Part two will review the different ways a couple can achieve a final divorce. Settlement is an alternative to pursuing litigation through trial.  A settlement agreement means that both parties were able to come to an understanding of how to resolve…

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sad-preschooler-and-mother

Impact of Divorce on Toddlers

  Understanding how divorce affects toddlers is critical to their emotional, physical and mental well-being. Toddlers may find divorce particularly confusing and stressful. They typically don’t understand what is going on and, in addition, have limited ability to express their thoughts and feelings. They understand that one parent is not living in the home, and that schedules are changing, but…

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happy

Choose to Live in Gratitude

Perhaps you are in the middle of a conflict with your co-parent or maybe even preparing for a legal battle in court with them.  You may be consumed with fear, anxiety or maybe even panic.  In order to be prepared, you find yourself staying up late typing summaries, transcribing hostile messages, and indexing email correspondence to prepare for the battle. …

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toddler

Toddler Development

Toddlerhood…the beginning of greater independence, defiant behavior, and your child’s awareness of themselves and their surroundings. As the world begins to open up, children 12 to 36 months of age experience an increase in their desire to explore new objects and people. Toddlers will imitate the behavior of others, especially adults and older children. They are beginning to master new…

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blunder three

Short-Sighted Parenting Plans

So you think you have worked out a great divorce settlement? You have created a plan based upon factors that make real sense to you. Maybe you created a plan based upon your child’s current age or your desire to not interrupt your child’s school schedule. Maybe you and your co-parent are friendly so you wrote your plan based upon…

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