two houses

Two Home Family Ritual

By Termini and Boyan Family separation is a life transition for all members involved and a family divorce ritual is a way to foster an improved relationship between former partners while also cultivating relationships within the family. My partner posted on the importance of divorce rituals on February 25th of this year. This joint effort provides you with a specific

Read More→

rituals

The Importance of Divorce Rituals

Important life events are typically marked by some type of ritual or ceremony.  Even preschoolers have graduation ceremonies to mark leaving preschool years and beginning kindergarten.  Then of course, there is kindergarten graduation, the end of elementary school, the end of middle school and of course the end of high school with the classic throwing of the cap.  When a

Read More→

images (90)

Problematic Thinking Styles in High-Conflict Divorce

Approximately 80% or more of high-conflict divorced families have at least one parent with a personality disorder. One of the hallmarks of a personality disorder is the pattern of distorted or problematic thought process. Another is their impaired interpersonal relationships. These thoughts understandably create havoc on their relationships. Some adults may use a problematic thought style without a personality disorder.

Read More→

preschool time share

Preschool Parenting Time Schedules After Separation and Divorce

Preschool parenting time schedules after separation and divorce should be consistent, predictable, routine in nature, and fulfill the unique needs of the child and their parents.   A child adjusts better once an ongoing routine has been established and is maintained. To promote a healthy adjustment, a child is entitled to spending time with each parent. Children between the ages of

Read More→

images2P4K0Y1H

Select Your Words Carefully When Explaining Your Pending Separation

You have likely read our earlier blog about how to tell your child about a divorce.  Hopefully you have also read my last blog about the reason why talking poorly about the child’s other parent is so damaging to your child’s self-esteem.  This blog will now take the dilemma one step further.  Choosing your words carefully is very important when

Read More→

read book

How Parents Can Help Their Preschool Child Navigate Divorce

Parents play a central role in helping their preschool child adapt to divorce. Children between the ages of three and five become fearful of losing their parents. Consequently, their relationship with both parents is critical to the child’s adjustment. Children generally fare best when they have the emotional support and ongoing involvement of both parents. Be supportive of your child’s

Read More→

under same roof one

Separated Yet Under the Same Roof

One of you has filed for divorce and now your spouse has been served. Your attorney may have advised you to remain in the marital residence until you are able to get a temporary hearing from a judge. This is not always a quick process, and you may be stuck together under the same roof for several months or possibly

Read More→

Preschool Girl

Impact of Divorce on the Preschool Child

Preschool children are often bewildered by their parents’ separation and divorce. Wallerstein and Kelly (1980), reported that observation of children during the first year after parental separation showed preschool age children lack the cognitive sophistication to understand the meaning of divorce. As a result, they experience a great deal of confusion when one parent departs from the family home. This

Read More→

sad child of divorce

Divorce and Your Child’s Self Esteem

In a solid marriage, our children are not intended to be our primary focus. The primary emphasis is intended to be the couple’s relationship. In the illustration of the three rings above, the parents are divorcing so the “ring” symbolizing the child is now on top signifying that the child is now the primary focus. The rings show the importance

Read More→

Preschool Children

Preschool Development

This is the first blog in a series that will address issues of preschool development, reactions to family separation, how parents can help their child between the ages of three and five navigate the separation process, and offer suggestions for living arrangements for this age group after separation or divorce. The preschool years are full of changes. Children ages three

Read More→